It's like a box of stick-on hugs.

Fiona fell over today and scraped her knees. She has been pretty sad about it all day and keeps hobbling around like she suddenly has a wooden leg which is funny for me, but then I feel bad for laughing at her. She needed a giant band-aid for the bad one and a little band-aid for the less scraped one and on the box I spotted this:

"You're going to be just fine!"? Really? Thanks for the warm fuzzies, band-aid. They're practically saying "suck it up, whiner, it's just a scratch".

I really hope they have a variety of helpful platitudes for the different products they offer... like on the roll of extra heavy duty antiseptic infused bandages... "looks like you've hurt yourself pretty badly buddy, maybe you should see a doctor". Or for the band-aid brand tourniquet... "you're in serious danger of death or permanent disfigurement, you should call 911".

Thanks for keeping it real, band-aid.